The Philosophy I Lived Before I Learned
The Philosophy I Lived Before I Learned
Before
I ever heard the term “Stoicism,” I had already met it — in the form of
setbacks, self-doubt, and silent perseverance.
I
used to think philosophy was just for scholars and dusty libraries. But then
life happened. And in those moments when things didn’t go my way — when I lost
competitions, felt unworthy, or questioned myself — I was unknowingly walking a
path of resilience, reflection, and inner strength.
It
wasn’t until I started reading about Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and Epictetus
that I realized:
I
had been living Stoicism before I even knew what it was.
This
blog is my attempt to make Stoicism relatable — to show how it's not just
ancient wisdom, but a mindset for modern-day struggles.
❌
Failure Was My First Teacher
Between
2024 and 2025, I faced one defeat after another — and each one chipped away at
my confidence. Here’s what my Notes app looked like:
Failed❌ | Learned✅
- Research
paper
- NLIU
moot
- OC
round
- Mock
trial
- Asia
Cup Moot (lost by 0.2 marks)
Each failure made me question myself. I felt helpless. I wanted to give up. But I didn’t. Something inside me pushed me to ask a better question:
“What can I learn from this?”
That
shift changed everything.
Writing
Down Lessons, Not Just Losses
Every
time I failed, I wrote down not just what went wrong — but what I learned.
Here's what those "failures" really gave me:
- I
overcame stage fear by giving a seminar in front of seasoned scholars.
- I
learned how to read and interpret a bare act (thank you, NLIU
moot).
- I
faced disappointment in the OC round — and learned to accept reality
without denial.
- I
held my ground during the mock trial, stood up to authority, and learned
how to stay calm under pressure.
- At
the Asia Cup Moot, I gave my all — only to lose by 0.2 marks. But I
realized something more important:
I realized I’m better suited as a speaker than a researcher — something I hadn’t recognized during my earlier moot court experiences where I mostly took on the researcher’s role.
These
aren’t small wins. These are foundations.
Yes,
those failures made me feel worthless at times. But Stoicism — and experience —
taught me something powerful:
“This
too shall pass.”
Just
because a poorly managed competition or uninterested judge didn’t see my worth,
doesn't mean I don’t have any. I no longer let flawed systems define my value.
Younger
Me Wouldn’t Believe This
There
are moments when I look back and think:
“You’ve come a long way, Samhitha."
At
18, I stood in front of a room full of people more than twice my age and spoke
with conviction. I questioned Authorities decisions. I chose law — a path
younger me never imagined.
I had grown in silence, through struggles, through little acts of courage no one clapped for.
But before you proceed, Here is a Note from the Author
I’m
not sharing these stories to sound pompous or to present myself as someone who
has “figured it all out.” I haven’t. I’ve stumbled more than I’ve succeeded,
and I still have a long way to go.
But
if even one person reading this finds comfort, strength, or clarity from my
journey — then sharing it was worth it.
I’m
not claiming to be the greatest. I haven’t achieved anything grand in the eyes
of the world.
But
I have achieved something that I believe is deeply valuable:
A
mindset of not giving up, and a quiet confidence that no matter how many times
I fall, I will rise.
And
that, I believe, will carry me further than any trophy ever could.
—
Samhitha
Letting
Go of Comparison: The Hardest Lesson
I
used to compare myself with everyone — a habit that was unknowingly passed down
through my upbringing. In school, I was often measured against others. So I
measured myself the same way.
But
university, and life itself, showed me something freeing:
"There
will always be someone better. But that doesn’t make you any less."
I did things others were too scared to try. I failed publicly and kept going. That’s what i see as courage and growth.
Did it all the failures hurt? A little. Did I lash out? Not anymore.
No
One Gets to Define My Worth But Me
I’ve
stopped letting competitions, judges, or even peers determine my value. Their
opinions are not my truth.
"My
worth isn’t up for debate. It’s mine to decide."
If
you’re stuck in that same loop — remember this: even the best of us are
underestimated at some point. That doesn’t make us small.
When
the Door Doesn’t Open, Find Another One
One
of my most meaningful experiences was trying to publish my research paper.
After months of waiting with no updates, I feared my work would be forgotten.
But
I didn’t let it go to waste. I knocked on new doors. And eventually, my paper
got selected by a different publisher.
Persistence
paid off — and that’s the heart of Stoicism:
"Control
what you can. Let go of what you can’t. Keep moving forward."
Final
Thoughts: You’re Already on the Path
If
you've ever felt defeated, lost, or behind — let me tell you something: you’re
not. You’re learning. You’re growing. You’re doing the quiet, unseen work that
truly matters.
I
once read a quote on Instagram that stayed with me—it moved something deep
within which goes as:
“Nice things will happen. But first, you’ll
lose hope and die inside 99 times.”
I’ve
been there. And I made it out — not by being perfect, but by refusing to give
up. That, my friend, is Stoicism in action.
Want
to Reflect With Me?
Here
are a few questions to think about (or write down):
- What
have your failures taught you that success never could?
- What
are you still letting define your worth — grades, people, or titles?
- What
lessons from your worst moments are you grateful for today?
Let’s
keep walking the Stoic path — imperfectly, but with heart.
The Journey is the Win
If you’ve read this far, thank you — not just for your time, but for being open to reflection.
I’ve learned that success isn’t about medals, certificates, or applause. It’s about quiet victories — showing up even when no one’s watching, learning even when you’ve just failed, and speaking truthfully even when your voice shakes.
Stoicism isn’t about being perfect. It’s about practicing courage, patience, and self-mastery — especially when the world around you feels chaotic.
So to anyone out there who feels like they’re behind, like they’ve failed too often to ever succeed — I hope this reminds you:
"You’re not broken. You’re becoming."
Let’s keep going. Quietly. Steadily. Together.
And yes, I Lived Stoicism Before I Knew Its Name
Great read.
ReplyDelete